D G D A D [Verse 1] D G D Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are pickin' at your local saloon G D A They got a new song out on Polish Records, it'll be a Polish hit real soon D G D They picked every honky-tonk and bar from here to Timbuktu G D A D Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are bustin' their butts for you [Verse 2] D G D Out where the cars are up on blocks and the houses are on wheels G D A Slim and a big time bookin' agent, they cooked up a hell of a deal D G D They'd pick every Wal-Mart parkin' lot across the USA G D A D If the Good Lord's willin' and the creek don't rise and they figure out how to get paid [Verse 3] G D No Chance was the only chance the Playboys ever had A No matter how they picked 'em, everything they played was bad D G D Then Slim come along and he played the songs that stick right in your head G D A D Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are really a-knockin' 'em dead [Instrumental] D G D A D G D G D A D [Verse 4] D G D Esmeralda Muckinfuch was Slim's good timin' gal G D A She wasn't much to look at but Slim loved her anyhow D G D You couldn't beat her when she's sober, but you had to when she's drunk G D A D We all called her the Country Kitty, 'cause she smelled just like a what in the world was that? [Verse 5] G D Slim Chance could be anyone who hangs out in a bar A Or any local yokel who sings and plays guitar D G D All the boys and girls around the world now they know who they are G D A D Slim Chance is about the best chance that they got to be a star [Verse 6] D G D Yesterday I couldn't even spell star, and now I are one G D I say I ain't but a star I are A Do they not know who we think we are? A I'm tellin' ya we're gonna get 500 a gig or we ain't playin! D I think we need some of them whores dejours G D And some of them carrots and other things people get in back of the stage G D We need some of them little sausages on toothpicks, maybe a dressing room (that'd be good)