(I found a different way to live)
My job is tough
You can see right through it to the roots
It’s rough
And you can feel the weight I bear
From the bitter moods of those who should care
They want a fight
Look at this, it’s a gout
Just one drop of tears for dreams I never shout
It burns like a spotlight
(I made a cake without sugar)
Even though I liked it
They said the dough was wrong
It wasn’t right
But even if it wasn’t good
I kept on baking in my neighborhood
Kept it tight
And when they finally find me out
I’ll be ready to step out
Without the weight
Sometimes I ask
What if I give up? Then what do I do?
But what if I go on? Then what will I prove?
And I keep asking
What if I mess up? What if I lose?
If it all ends, what will I choose?
But I know that one day this will all end
And I will do what I want
Without their judgment closing in
And I know when this is done
It might feel strange
But I’ll feel free again
And I knew I would feel glad
When the worst had passed
And I stopped walking around the hole
I also knew that when I stopped being sad
From all the things I had to let go
I would begin again
Only now learning how to live
Learning how to live
(It's gonna work out, right?)
I thought it would be easy
But maybe I'm too far down
Raising myself too high
I'm no prophet
But I won’t drown in my own storm
I’ll be fine
I have to be strong
I’ve waited too long for the change to come
Just a dim light shines
Sometimes I ask
What if I give up? Then what do I do?
But what if I go on? Then what will I prove?
And I keep asking
What if I mess up? What if I lose?
If it all ends, what will I choose?
But I know that one day this will all end
And I will do what I want
Without their judgment closing in
And I know when this is done
It might feel strange
But I’ll feel free again
And I knew I would feel glad
When the worst had passed
And I stopped walking around the hole
I also knew that when I stopped being sad
From all the things I had to let go
I would begin again
Maybe this is wrong
(Maybe I am wrong)
But I don’t care
(But this, I do care)
Even if I wait all night
(Even if I cry all night)
Even if it turns to a nightmare
(Even if I fall into fear)
I know I can be strong
(I will be strong)
Even if it breaks like glass
(I'll carry the shards)
But I know that one day this will all end
And I will do what I want
Without their judgment closing in
(Now knowing how to live)
And I know when this is done
It might feel strange
But I’ll feel free again
(Only now learning how to live)
And I knew I would feel glad
When the worst had passed
And I stopped walking around the hole
(Now knowing how to live)
I also knew that when I stopped being sad
From all the things I had to let go
I would begin again
Only now learning how to live
Learning how to live
Now I'm learning how to live
Learning how to live
How to live