[Intro:] G

G
The mongrel cat came home
Holding half a head
Proceeded to show it off
To all his new found friends
He said "I been where I liked
I slept with who I liked
She ate me up for breakfast
And screwed me in a vice
     Bm
And now I don't know why
                  G   Bm
I feel so tongue-tied"

G
I sat in the cupboard
                      Bm
And wrote it down in neat
They were cheering and waving
Cheering and waving
Twitching and salivating
Like with myxomatosis
           G
But it got edited fucked up
Strangled, beaten up
Bm
Used as a photo in time magazine
Buried in a burning black hole in devon
 G                                  Bm
"I don't know why I feel so tongue-tied
                  Em
Don't know why I feel so skinned alive."

                  (G Bm)
My thoughts are misguided and a little naive
I twitch and I salivate like with myxomatosis
You should put me in a home or you should put me down
I got myxomatosis, I got myxomatosis
"Now no one likes a smart arse but we all like stars"
That wasn't my intention, I did it for a reason
It must have got mixed up
Strangled, beaten up
I got myxomatosis
I got myxomatosis

G                    Em             G   Bm Em6 Em
"I don't know why I feel so tongue-tied"